You are not alone.
Right now, your doubts and fears may feel like some kind of personal failure, and that makes it hard to talk about. That’s okay. There are people out there who want to listen to your story, not to save you or convert you or fix you (though those people exist too), but because they love you and they’ve been where you are.
I love you, and I’ve been where you are.
And your friends who are trying to fix you, try to be patient with them. They’re doing what they think is best for you- just like the rest of us. They really believe in this God, and they really believe he has not abandoned you, and they really believe that you will someday come to believe that too. They just want to help you get there faster.
For the record, I believe that too.
I have no easy answers. I don’t know how God can be good and just and leave the world in the state it’s in. I can’t explain why bad things happen to good people or why there’s no archaeological evidence for the Exodus or why Christians are so against believing in climate change.
I just want you to know that I’ll sit with you in the questions. I’ll sit with you even if you leave the questions and the faith behind, or if you somehow decide this God is worth trusting in one more time. And I’ll pray for you and with you, that the doubt won’t be so isolating and fearful, that you would take hold of hope.
I have hope for you, dear friend. I guess what I’m trying to say is, you can’t shake me. Your questions and doubts will not scare me away and I will never require that you have it more together than you have it right now.
I love you. And whether or not you believe it, God does too.
This post is part of my 31 days of Love Letters series. Click here to see the rest of the posts in the series.